About
Esther Obiri-Darko
I have over 20 years of working with children, young people and families. I provide skilled therapeutic support to children, adolescents and parents, delivered with, sensitivity, thoughtfulness, authenticity and warmth. My role is to enable children, young people and parents to thrive. To help them to make sense of their difficult feelings and understand themselves and others better, so they can enjoy their lives more fully. By collaborating with clients, my aim is to support clients find within themselves a space of loving kindness and greater acceptance. My work has been in secondary and primary schools, charitable community services as well as in a Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service within the NHS. Therapy can and does make a difference and can take different forms. Alongside talking therapy, I use a variety of tools during therapy, depending on the client’s needs, developmental age and personality As a psychodynamic psychotherapist: I use Psychoanalytical theory in my thinking i.e. I think about what is being communicated unconsciously as well as literally; I hold the relationship between the therapist and client of great importance and value. I am systemic in thinking about the child or young person in the context of his/her family, school and society. I am creative in the way I use play and art, as a catalyst for telling stories or unlocking memories that may reveal messages and beliefs from the unconscious mind. I offer therapeutic support for a wide range of issues including Anxiety Bullying Friendship difficulties Depression Disordered eating Emotional regulation Difficulties (anger) Identity issues - Loss, low mood Self-harm and much more Qualifications MA in Psychological therapies with children, young people, and families. (Tavistock and Portman and University of Essex) Postgraduate Certificate Child, Adolescent and Family Mental Wellbeing: multidisciplinary practice Tavistock and Portman with the University of Essex Certificate in Higher Education - Counselling and Counselling Skills, Birkbeck University Certified Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga Teacher, British Wheel of Yoga. I am a registered Member of British Psychoanalytic Council, BPC and a member of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy, BACP.
For Children
Changing schools, class or when friends start behaving in a weird way can make life feel difficult. Perhaps your parents are having a hard time and you feel lonely, angry or sad. It may feel that there is no one you can talk to about these big feelings, or no one will understand. Coming to see a child therapist is a chance for you to have someone who is just there for you, no matter how you are feeling. You can talk about the things that worry you, make you feel upset and the things that matter to you. You may not always want to talk, you might feel you’d like to play, draw, paint or create. All of these things you can do. Child psychotherapy can be a way to explore what’s going on in your life and can help you feel better.
"Inside every child there is a story that needs to be told" Donald Winnicott
For Children
Changing schools, class or when friends start behaving in a weird way can make life feel difficult. Perhaps your parents are having a hard time and you feel lonely, angry or sad. It may feel that there is no one you can talk to about these big feelings, or no one will understand. Coming to see a child therapist is a chance for you to have someone who is just there for you, no matter how you are feeling. You can talk about the things that worry you, make you feel upset and the things that matter to you. You may not always want to talk, you might feel you’d like to play, draw, paint or create. All of these things you can do. Child psychotherapy can be a way to explore what’s going on in your life and can help you feel better.
“the adolescent period of life is in reality the one with the most power for courage and creativity. Life is on fire when we hit our teens…” Daniel J. Siegel
For Teenagers
Being a teenager can be tough, you have a lot to deal with. There are so many things that can feel out of your control. Figuring out who you are, what you want to be, alongside worries about friendships, pressure from school, navigating your online life as well as your family life can affect the way you feel. You care about your friends, but you can’t always talk to them about your worries. Perhaps you don’t want to overburden them or make them feel bad. You may feel sacred that they might judge you or see you differently. So it might feel like the safest thing is to keep it inside, bottle it up, or deal with your problems in a way that is hurting you. Perhaps you are full of overwhelming strong emotions that you can’t make sense of. It can be challenging to share or open up to a therapist (me), but it is often easier and helpful to talk to someone who is neutral, someone who is outside of what is going on. As a therapist for teenagers I provide a safe confidential space to reflect, play and think. I am here to listen and walk alongside you to explore whatever comes up in the room. I’m not going to tell you what you ‘should’ or ‘shouldn’t’ be doing. I will support you in growing your understanding of yourself and gain a more positive perception about the courage, strength and that which is good in you. When you come for our conversations, you can bring whatever is on your mind. It could be a specific problem, or it could be a question about life in general. We can explore more general feelings of low mood, anxiety, depression or things you are worried about. You can also talk to me when things are going well. Sometimes you may not feel like talking, you don’t have to. If you’d like, you can draw, paint, or be creative. It’s completely up to you. You are in the driver’s seat. My hope is that you will find that therapy is a place where you can feel understood, understand yourself better, come to trust yourself, begin to flourish and find a way to walk through your life in a way that feels right for you.
"The parent-child connection is the most powerful mental health intervention known to humanity" Bessel van der Kolk
For Parents
My work with parents allows for opportunities to explore the challenges of parenting in a non-judgemental environment and I endeavour to help families transition out of old, unhelpful patterns, and create new ones, together. I strongly believe that beneath every behaviour is a feeling, and beneath every feeling is a need. Using mentalisation techniques, we will explore together what those needs might be and how to meet your child’s need. My hope is that you feel supported as you explore these difficult and sometimes painful places in your child-parent relationship life and you gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your child.
Mother-Daughter Coaching
The bond between mother and daughter is one of the most precious relationships in life. It can also be a complex and challenging one. • Do you feel your relationship with your mother/daughter is unhealthy? • Do you want to improve your relationship with your mother or daughter or both? • Are you feeling like you cannot express yourself freely in your relationship with your mother/daughter? • Does your relationship with your mother/daughter cause you pain? • Are you feeling like your needs are not met? • Are you tired of not being heard? • Do you feel silenced or find it hard to advocate for yourself? • Do you want to start to heal and break dysfunctional intergenerational cycles? If you have said yes to any of these questions, I can help. As one of the few certified Mother-Daughter coaches in the UK I work to help mothers and daughters deepen their connection, improve communication, and navigate difficult situations together. I support mothers and daughters to create stronger, more emotionally bonded relationships by teaching them exercises and tools that enhance their understanding of each other and their ability to listen to one another. I provide a safe, non judgmental and supportive environment for you to express your feelings and perspectives, while also facilitating constructive dialogue and problem-solving. Together we will: • Understand root causes of conflict and pain in your relationship • Understand the role of family history, culture, religion, and politics in your role as a woman and how this impacts your relationship • Heal mother-daughter relationship conflict • Examine and challenge your expectations of each other • Learn how to assert healthy boundaries so that you can enjoy the time you have together • Learn to feel seen and heard in this and other relationships • Uncover themes and patterns that cause emotional disempowerment and attachment disruption. • Feel confident to voice what you feel, think, and need as a woman. • Facilitate generational change • Develop a roadmap that aids in recognising and understanding the connection between you, your mother’s and your grandmother’s lives. • Heal and strengthen the Mother-Daughter relationship. Mother-Daughter Coaching is based on the Mother-Daughter Attachment Model developed by renowned psychotherapist and author Rosjke Hasseldine. Hasseldines ground breaking research on mother-daughter relationships has helped countless women to heal and improve their connections with their mothers and daughters. I offer both individual and mother-daughter coaching sessions. The service is available in person or online. Investment • 6-8 eight, 90-minute joint/ 50 minute individual coaching sessions • Three-month commitment • Personalized mother daughter generational map • Customized homework and resources • Guidance from a Certified Mother Daughter Coach Mother-Daughter couple sessions - £165 Individual sessions - £85
“Being Heard + Being Understood = Feeling Loved”
Rosjke Hasseldine